Me: For christmas I want a unicorn.
Santa: Be realistic..
Me: Okey, I want a boyfriend.
Santa: What color do you want on your unicorn?
“It’s the 21st century. I don’t need an alpha male to protect me. I need a geek who can get my naked photos off the cloud.” —Whitney Cummings
“I’m dropping hints that I’m single. I’m single.” — Kim Kardashian
“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” — Lily Tomlin
I been single for a while and I have to say its going very well.. Like..Its really working out.. I think Im the one.. – Emilie Heller
Current relationshipstatus; Made dinner for two. Ate both.
Date someone whos giving you the same feeling of when you see your food coming at a resturant.
I’m single. And you got to be totally and beyond amazing to change that.
Singlelife; Realizing you can eat peanut butter out of the jar without judgement.
“If we meet offline, and you look nothing like your pics, you’re buying me drinks until you do.” – Unknown
“I went out with a guy once who told me I didn’t need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, ‘I’m drinking so that you’re more fun to be around.”‘– Chelsea Handler
“I look great in my profile pictures. They were taken when I didn’t need online dating to meet people.”